I was reflecting today as I was working and meditating on God as to where we (God and I) are at in our relationship.
He spoke truth to me about something that has troubled me considerably in these recent years.
I was mediating on why I felt that, though I am closer to Him now than say four years ago, I am worth less.
My reasons? I have been through difficulties that have refashioned me. In shaping me, I have grown. However, I have also received scratches that healed to form scars. I have more gravity, but more weighs upon my spirit.
It has been my thinking that I am not as pure before God because of the baggage I carry from wounds that have defaced my beauty. I am worth less.
God visited my meditations today, however, and spoke truth apart from this deception. It is a personal epiphany in my life.
He let me see as he does. I saw that any residual materials from past trials are but stepping stones. They are Gilgal's memorial stones of Jordan. I can pass over the locale, remembering what I learned, and apply it to the current situation.
Should I feel less valuable for winning a battle because I must recover the cost of war? War brings devastation. It can also produce resolve. God instructed my heart to understand that rubble does not indicate failure. It is only proof that a battle has been fought.
If you can honestly say, "I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith," be assured that there is a crown of righteousness -not Holy disdain- that will be restored unto you.
